"You got this covered"

I attend a contemporary worship service on Sunday evenings. From time to time I am asked to give the sermon at the service. But not earlier tonight, the pastor of the church, Jim, was giving the sermon.

Just as the band was beginning their last song before the sermon, a man came in. I had never seen him before but he sat down behind this guy named Joe and started talking to him. I wondered if he was just some guy looking for handouts but by the way he just started talking to Joe I assumed they knew each other. He spoke to Joe for a minute, I saw Joe shake his head no and the man got up. He came to me. He told me some story about how he was low on gas and he needed a ride to get back to his wife and baby who were in his car at some gas station several miles away. The story he told was insignificant to me as his breath had the yeasty sent of beer. I wasn't going to give this guy any money, and definitely not a ride somewhere.

When he realized I wasn't going to be of any help he moved on to another rube. He happened to ask Pastor Jim next. Now keep in mind all of this is taking place while the band is playing their last song before the sermon and I can forsee some awkwardness as the band will soon finish and Jim is still talking to this grifter. I watch out of the corner of my eye. Jim talks to the man, then taps a guy name Ron on the shoulder and asks him a question. Ron is probably the biggest, most intimidating guy there and he also doesn't smile often. Ron gets up and talks to the guy with Jim. I'm not sure what's going on but Jim is the type to give someone’s story the benefit of the doubt and want to help him. And as Jim approaches me, with that look on his face like he needs to ask me a serious favor, I think to myself "man, this is going to suck."

"Ron and I are going to take this guy to his car. You got this covered?"

As in can I do the sermon in his absence. The sermon that is about to start in less than thirty seconds. Can I do an impromptu sermon and make it actually mean something. That is what he was asking with his nonchalant, "you got this covered."

"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh?" I respond.

"Or I could give you the keys to my car and you could take him."

"I got this. I'll do the sermon."

I felt a whole lot more comfortable getting up completely unprepared and doing a sermon than I did giving this other guy a ride to his , probably non-existent, family.

Jim and Ron and the guy left as I got up and said "Uhhhh... anybody got a bible with them?"

Hue is on first

I had an interview today for a promotion with in Fed Ex. I have been doing double shifts 2 nights a week, working on two different belts and the interview was to make me full time rather than part time. On a side note, when I person is first hired they are assigned to a Load Coach who is to teach the new hire to load. They are in training with the Load Coach for three weeks and then they are done with them. My Load Coach was an Asian guy named Hue (pronounced just like the English name Hugh). Here is part of the conversation of my interview with a Hub Manager.

Manager: "So you have been doing double shifts on Blue belt and Purple belt, that means your supervisors are Mark and... uhh..."

Me: "Mike"

Manager: "Yeah, Mike, that's right. And who was your load coach?"

Me: "Hue."

Manager: "Your Load Coach, who was it?"

Me: "Yeah, that's right."

Manager: "No, I am asking who your Load Coach was."

Me: "Hue."

Manager: "You know, the person that trained you to load when you first started."

Me: "Hue was my load coach."

Manager: "I don't know who your Load Coach was, you should remember that."

Me: "Yeah, Hue was."

Manager: "Do you remember what he looked like?"

Me: "Yeah, the Asian guy."

Manager: "Oh, that's Hue."

You could see it here, when the light went off. He sat for a second as if he was pondering some deep philosophical concept. The he resumed eye contact with me and looked moderately ticked off.

Me: "Oh come on, that was pretty good."

He was definitely not amused. I think he thought I was trying to make a fool out of him... and in hind sight I guess I was. But I got the promotion anyways.


*Disclaimer: The previous conversation may have never actually taken place. This could be one of those cases where I thought of something really funny to say 30 minutes later.

Disappointment of the day

The Mavs dropped DJ Mbenga and signed veteran PF Juwan Howard. Sure Juwan Howard fills a void in the lineup but now who is going to run around wildly at the end of blowout games fouling people? Who? Trenton Hassel? JJ Barea? Nope, no one. Maybe Dirk can pick up some of the slack in that department. Seriously, wouldn't it be fun to see Dirk running around at the end of games just slamming into people like Mbenga used to?

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