Congratulate Me

I've just been informed that I've won the United Nations Humanitarian Award. I just received an email[1] notifying me that I've been selected as the winner for the month of April 2008[2]. Obviously I am way excited about finally getting recognized for my efforts. There is also a cash reward that goes with this award, 245,000 GBP. That's a lot of money. 245,000 pounds is roughly[3] 483,457.87 US dollars. All I have to do to collect my reward and money is email fiduciary agent in Liverpool a bunch of personal information and he'll send it right to me[4].

I can't wait until I get the money; I've been trying to decide what to do with it. I've always wanted to become a big game hunter, or maybe I could poach elephants, there's a lot of money to be made in ivory these days. Maybe I could invest in the logging industry, there is tons of rain forest left. Or if I could just find a way to use the money to suppress a third world country, that would be ideal. At any rate, once I get the award and become famous I'll completely forget about all of my current friends and I'll start dating a hot ex-playboy centerfold (and the sex will be amazing)[5].

All that's left now is for me to email this guy all of my personal information and I should receive the award very soon.


1. It makes sense that email would be the preferred way of notification for the United Nations Humanitarian Award.
2. Apparently they do this monthly, I can't believe this the first I've heard of this award.
3. I say roughly because the market fluctuates.
4. With a word like fiduciary it must be legit.
5. Clearly they've given the Humanitarian Award to the right person.